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Zombie Turkeys First Chapter For You

Best Science Stories Zombie Turkeys Gift

Zombie Turkeys First Chapter For You! Enjoy the first chapter of my book Zombie Turkeys as my gift to you!

But there’s more–you can get not just the first chapter, but the whole book by clicking here: Zombie Turkeys.

Here you go!

Bartonville

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Zombie Turkey, Chapter 1 icon

He felt different. More energetic, more alive. He bred with female after female in his flock without tiring. The tom stayed awake through the night. He feared no predator.

Then a turkey hunter shot him.

The setting sun overlooked a crisp, clear evening in early November. South of Bartonville, Illinois, a farmer had leased his wood lot to two turkey hunters. Big and burly in their bulky camouflaged outfits, they had just bagged one.

“Good shot, Pete!”

“He’s a big ‘un!”

Pete and Bob walked up to the tom turkey, bleeding on the cold ground. The rest of the flock had scattered into the woods. He had exceptionally good plumage and weighed perhaps twenty pounds. Pete reached down and picked him up by the neck.

“He weighs at least twenty-five pounds!”

Then the turkey’s eyes opened—and gleamed red. He kicked with his spurs and pecked savagely at Pete’s arms and eyes. Dozens of his hens attacked the men from behind.

“Gobble! Gobble!”

He felt different. More energetic, more alive. He had no memory of being shot, but a certain turkey satisfaction at killing his killers. The tom also enjoyed pecking at their dead meat. He had always liked frogs, but this meat tasted better. He led his flock down the road, in search of more predators to eat.

* * *

Zombie Turkeys First Chapter For You – Part 2

Bill Westcot, the coroner of Midley, Illinois (population 512), had seen his share of grisly deaths, but this one took the cake. Two hunters apparently pecked to death by turkeys. How could this be?Wild turkeys were normally shy and secretive, not even as aggressive as geese. Bill looked up as a man came in—average height, maybe five nine, medium build, not fat, not skinny, roundish face, hazel eyes, and brown hair. He would be hard to remember. But Bill had known him all his life.

Sam Melvin, the reporter for Midley Beacon, dropped in for his daily chat. Sam and Bill had been friends since elementary school, and they had both stayed around Midley all their lives. Bill, a short, stocky guy with blondish hair, had gone off to school and become a coroner.

Sam had stayed in Midley after high school, doing odd jobs, until he got on with the Midley Beacon. As a reporter and blogger for a small-town weekly paper,Sam wasn’t especially busy, and he liked to socialize.

When he saw what remained of the corpses on the mortuary slabs, Sam exclaimed, “Gowlurp! Gaawka-urop!” He ran to the bathroom and puked. After washing out his mouth, he returned, eyes averted.

Zombie Turkeys First Chapter For You – part 3

“Who in the hell were those poor bastards?”

“Peter James and Robert Smithville, according to their drivers’ licenses and their shooting permits.”

“They look like someone went at them with a thousand pickaxes.”

“Yup. Pretty gruesome, even for me.”

“What in the world happened?”

“As far as I can tell, they were pecked to death by a flock of wild turkeys.”

“I’ve never heard of anything like that!”

“Yeah, that’s not really normal turkey behavior.”

“Could they be rabid?”

“Turkeys don’t get rabid, Sam.”

“They don’t attack hunters either. Is ‘death by wild turkey’ what you’ll put on their death certificates?”

“Yeah, I guess so.”

“Well, that’s what I’ll put as my story headline then. It’ll be in tomorrow’s paper.”

“Make sure when you write it up, people know that ‘wild turkey’ is a bird and not liquor.”

“How can you joke when you have these poor fellows on the slab over there?”

“It’s a job. You get used to it.”

* * *

Zombie Turkeys First Chapter For You – Part 4

He led his flock in the evenings and mornings across the woods and fields. They rested during the day. They did not encounter any more predators. If he’d been human, he would have sighed. They settled for their normal forage, as well as small amphibians. They met a couple of other flocks of wild turkeys. He defeated their toms and took their hens. His flock numbered over a hundred now.

He smelled something on the wind. Turkeys. He headed that way, leading his flock.

* * *

Leaning on the gate to his barn, Amos Yoder, owner of Yoder Turkey Farms, looked over his turkeys with pride. He raised over ten thousand turkeys, all fed on non-GMO grain that he grew himself. His internet business was booming. He was even selling turkeys on Amazon!Selling organically fed turkeys over the internet had led to him buying a Cadillac and motor home with cash after growing up on the family turkey farm. All he had to do was keep the turkeys clean and comfortable and fed.

A life of hard physical labor had given him arms thick as a chuck roast. People always thought of him as taller than he was because of his broad chest and big head. Most of the time, he took things as they came. In trouble or opposition, he was an immovable rock.

Behind him he heard the “Gobble! Gobble!” of a turkey. He thought one had slipped out of the other gate in the barn. Turning around quickly, his mouth dropped. Over a hundred wild turkeys were running at him!A big tom with a reddish stain on his breast led the charge. Their bright-red eyes chilled Amos’s blood.

Zombie Turkeys First Chapter For You – Part 5

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A turkey who missed the free book offer.

“Gobble! Gobble!”

Slipping around the gate to the barn, he grabbed his gun. Aiming carefully, he shot the tom in the breast. He dropped like a stone. The remaining turkeys continued in a wave toward the gate, flying up and bouncing off the heavy mesh used to keep the turkeys in. “Gobble! Gobble!” they screamed in futility.

Amos smiled smugly. “That’ll keep them out.”But the tom stood up. He wobbled a little and led the flockto the other side of the barn.

“I swore I hit him!”Amos put down the .22 long rifle he’d used. In the office he pulled hisshotgun out of the gun safe. “Let’s see how he handles a shotgun blast!At least I won’t miss with this.” He ran to the gate at the other end of the barn. The turkeys flew up, trying to peck their way through the mesh.

“It’s like Hitchcock’s The Birds,” Amos grumbled. “But they didn’t have a pump-action shotgun in that movie.”

Zombie Turkeys First Chapter For You – Part 6

He cracked open a door and blasted them. Three or four turkeys exploded in a spray of blood and feathers. But the rest didn’t flee in panic. They turned as one and charged toward the door. BLAM! KA-BLAM! BLAM! BLAM! As fast as he could pump, Amos fired shell after shell of 00 shot into them. Over two dozen fell into piles of shredded meat. Then the first ones he’d blasted stood up. The turkeys’ exposed muscle glistened red with blood, with entrails hanging down and dragging on the ground—but they hopped and staggered toward him.

He was so dumbfounded—the turkeys actually reached the door. BLAM!Three more birds turned to turkey burger. Click.Out of ammo. He tried to slam the door—but the big tom blocked him. He had blood all over his breast, but he pecked and kicked with his spurs like a demon.

“Ow!”Amos slammed the butt of the shotgun into the turkey with a satisfying crunch. Three turkeys flew through the open door and landed on his face. Spurs gouged his cheeks and eyes. He thrashed wildly, but dozens more piled on. A pile of pecking, kicking, gouging turkeys soon buried him.

“Gobble! Gobble!”

The mound under the feeding turkeys twitched and was still.

* * *

Zombie Turkeys First Chapter For You – Part 7

He felt strong, powerful. He now had many more hens with which to breed. So he went to it immediately.

The turkeys only had one door ajar into the barn, but as dozens and hundreds and thousands joined the flock, the weight of them sprung the door completely open. They found other predators around the barn and dispatched them. The flock spotted the grain silos and feasted. They continued into the woods and fields around the barns, ever expanding their territory.

* * *

“What?” Sam Melvin exclaimed as he read the Normal Shout‘s story about the mysterious death at Yoder’s turkey farm and the disappearance of ten thousand turkeys.

“Keep it down,” growled Lisa Kambacher, his boss and the editor of the Midley Beacon, and the only other employee at the small weekly newspaper. “I’m busy editing your crap.”

Sam swiveled his ancient, uncomfortable office chair from his laptop so he faced Lisa. He’d garbage-picked that chair from his neighbor in Midley when he was hired fifteen years ago. Her thin face, framed in brown hair, peered at the computer screen.

Lisa’s dark-brown eyes stared intently at what she edited. Maybe it was the piece Sam had written about Mrs. Huntington and her award-winning afghans. He hadn’t enjoyed reporting that; he couldn’t imagine she’d like editing it.

“Drop that story and put in this one. The crap has really hit the fan now. Remember the grisly deaths of those turkey hunters I wrote about last week?”

Zombie Turkeys First Chapter For You – Part 8

“Yeah. That was a great story. We sold out that edition and had to run another five hundred copies.” Lisa looked up from her computer.

“It looks like that flock of killer turkeys is now ten thousand or more.”

“That is a good story. Where are they?”

“No one knows.”

“Well, go out and find them!Oh, and write a story connecting the two occurrences before you go. Maybe we’ll publish a special ‘Killer Turkey’ edition. It will be very appropriate for November, between Halloween and Thanksgiving.” She smiled hopefully. “Maybe that one will sell out too! I could use a new laptop.”

“I want some hazard pay for this story.”

“OK, I’ll give you an extra hundred bucks if you come back with the turkeys’ location. Oh, and take a shotgun.”

“Fat lot of good that did for poor Amos Yoder. He emptied six shells from his, and he still got henpecked to death.” Sam shook his head sadly.

“What could they tell from the dead turkeys they found?”

“That’s one more weird thing:there were no dead turkeys. They found lots of blood, 00 buckshot, and his bloody corpse.”

“That’s good stuff. Write it all up and hightail it out of here,” Lisa urged.

Zombie Turkeys First Chapter For You – Part 9

After typing up his story and sending it to Lisa for editing, he stared at her.

Because of his good grades, Sam’s high school English teacher had suggested he volunteer for the school paper. He’d gone to the newspaper “office,” a walk-in closet, and had seen a tall, slender girl pounding away on an old IBM PC. She’d looked up sharply, scowled, and said, “What do you want? Do you have a story?”

“Uh, um, I’d like to work for the newspaper.”

“Hmmm. I could use a reporter. Let me test you out. There’s a track meet today after school. Go to it. Get all the winners and losers and their feelings.Our readers care about them.Write it up, and report back to me here by seven p.m.”

“You’ll still be here at that time?” Sam asked incredulously.

“Of course. I’m the editor and head reporter and writer. I’ve got twenty stories to write, and I’ve got to report on the tennis match after school today. I expect you to work just as hard, if you want to stay on.”

“Uh, OK.”

“What’s your name, anyway?”

“Sam Melvin.”

“Sam, I’m Lisa Kambacher. Do what I say, and we’ll get along fine. Cross me, and you’ll regret it for the rest of your life!”

Sam had later learned that after she’d graduated from college, Lisa had started the Midley Beacon, the town’s first newspaper and one of the first online newspapers in the ’90s. Amazingly, by pinching pennies, she’d actually been able to keep it going these past fifteen years.

Zombie Turkeys First Chapter For You – Part 10

Sam sighed. Shaking off his reverie, he pulled up a map on his laptop and studied central Illinois. The turkey hunters were killed west of the Illinois River and south of Bartonville. Yoder’s turkey farm sat between Hanna City and Smithville. So the wild turkeys had traveled about  fifteen miles during that week. They went northwest through farms and scrub. From Yoder’s farm they had a clear shot due north to the several square miles of wilderness surrounding the Wildlife Prairie Park. Sam guessed they would avoid built-up areas and travel by night, roosting among trees during the day. Central Illinois was pretty sparsely settled, and even a flock of ten thousand turkeys could hide in the many wooded creeks and valleys.

The Yoder farm had been attacked yesterday. If the turkeys moved two miles a day, they’d arrive in the park in about two or three days. Sam drew a circle of four miles around the turkey farm. He’d spend the day circling around it.

* * *

Most of the day Sam drove up and down Illinois 116 and Taylor Road. The sun shone brightly, making the November day surprisingly warm. He used his binoculars to look across the fallow fields of November to the tree line of the nearest creek—Johnson Run.

Zombie Turkeys First Chapter For You – Part 11

He drove around Greengold Road and Murphy Road, and stopped and talked with the people of Hanna City. They were pretty upset over Amos Yoder’s death. The townspeople knew and liked Amos since he had grown up in the area. People in central Illinois were pretty stable; they tended to live and work in or near the towns where they grew up.

Sam stopped at the office of the Hanna City Monitor, the town’s paper, to trade what the Monitor‘s reporters had found with what he knew about the story. It was twice the size of the Midley Beacon‘s one-room rental on the Main Street of Midley. It had better furniture too.

“Hi, Sam Melvin of the Midley Beacon.”

“Hi, Sam. I’m James Appleby, the feature’s reporter. What can I do for you?”said a middle-aged man with gray-and-brown hair. “Have a seat.” He gestured to a spare chair.

Sitting, Sam said, “I’ve been following these turkey attacks since last week when we had two hunters killed in Bartonville. What can you tell me about the attack on Yoder’s turkey farm?”

“You don’t say? Well, poor Amos’s body, or what was left of it,was discovered by a truck driver dropping off supplies for the farm.The attack apparently had taken place at about seven a.m. in the morning. His wife, Helen, had already left for town, where she teaches third grade.”He paused. “I didn’t know about the deaths of those turkey hunters. What can you tell me?”

“They were hunting turkeys that evening and were pecked to death. Here’s a printout of our news story and our website. Go ahead and use it and cite us as your source.”

“Thanks. I’ll be sure to link to your original story.”

Part 12

Sam looped around to the south of Hanna City and drove to Yoder Turkey Farms. He slammed his car door in the driveway and headed toward the nearest building. The grounds were neat and tidy, with white fences and white trim on the dark-green barn, but the barn doors gaped open. The turkeys had left, but their smell remained. A dark, wet area stained the ground in front of a sprung door. That must be where Amos Yoder had died, Sam thought.

“Can I help you?”

Sam turned around and saw a middle-aged woman looking at him. She had light-brown hair with a few gray streaks. She looked like she would be a fine grandmother in a few years. Her eyes were weary and her face haggard though.

“Hi. I’m Sam Melvin, reporter from the Midley Beacon. Are you Mrs. Yoder?”

“Yes.”

“My condolences, ma’am. I can’t imagine how you feel.”

“Thank you. I’m a little numb. It doesn’t seem real. It’s like something in a book.” She rubbed her hands up and down her arms, as if chilled.

Zombie Turkeys First Chapter For You – Part 13

First Draft Complete Welcome 2024
Zombie Turkeys Free Chapter For You -
Zombie Turkeys fly to escape to Zombie Turkey hunters

“Yes. I can understand if you don’t want to talk. Are you able to answer a few questions?”

“I’ll try.”

Sam flipped to a blank page on his reporter’s notebook. “Was there anyone else on the farm at the time?”

“Yes. Fred Jones and Harry Bishop were working here. They’re as dead as poor Amos.”

“You don’t say!I hadn’t heard that.”

“The truck driver found Amos, and I got notified. Later, the police found the others. I was completely out of it yesterday.”

Sam nodded. “I understand. I read that Amos’s shotgun had been used.”

“Yes. At least he went down with a fight. He also shot his .22 rifle. The police found that in his office, and his gun safe open.”

“The most puzzling thing is there were no turkey bodies found.”

“Not exactly.”

Part 14

A crowd of zombie turkeys, on Thanksgiving
Zombie Turkeys Free Chapter For You -
A crowd of zombie turkeys, on Thanksgiving

“What do you mean?”

“The police found pieces of turkey scattered around the barn gate, just as you’d expect from a shotgun, but no bodies.”

“What do you think happened to them?”

“I don’t know. Maybe the turkeys ate them.”

“But why would they leave behind scraps?”

“I don’t know, Mr. Melvin. I don’t know how I’m going to live. I’ve lost Amos, I’ve lost the turkeys, and I’ll probably lose the farm!” Tears trickled down her cheeks.

Sam uncomfortably put his arm around the crying woman. “Do you have any insurance?”

“I don’t know!” She sobbed and then hiccupped. “I think so. Amos had life insurance. But he ran the business! I teach school and decorate the house and then do gardening!” She cried again.

“Um, did anyone know Amos’s business affairs?”

She stopped crying. “Yes—his insurance agent, Zo Limbach. I could call him.”

“Good idea.”

“Would you mind leaving now?”

“Thank you for your time Mrs. Yoder. God bless you.”

“Thank you for your help. Good-bye.” Sam looked around. It was a big farm. Down two hands, the owner, and ten thousand turkeys. Sam didn’t know how she was going to live either.

He felt great. He was full of energy, he had many hens to breed with, and he was the leader of a great flock. The flock stayed close to the woods and streams. They rested now, in and under the trees by the river. In the evening he’d lead them upstream. That felt like the right direction.


Bye For Now!

Andy Zach in repose
Zombie Detective Excerpt 3
Andy Zach in repose
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Your New Reviews and Some of Mine

Your New Reviews and Some of Mine. You gave me, Andy Zach, some reviews of my books. And I just reviewed some books in the past month, too. So, let’s share.

I posted my most recent review the other day on Goodreads:

Your New Reviews and Some of Mine – The Eye of the World

The Eye of the World cover
Your New Reviews

December 5, 2025

I first read this book in 1994, soon after it came out. I bought it because of the cover and the blurb. I thought it might be a clever knock-off of the Lord of the Rings.

Author Robert Jordan used some elements of that epic in the beginning of his story, but it is nothing like the Lord of the Rings–but it is still very good epic fantasy.

The book begins in a backwater town of Two Rivers, famous for sheep and tabac. Rand al’Thor, a sheepherder, and his two friends, Perrin ay’Barra, a blacksmith, and Mat Cauthon, a son of a horsetrader, have all been shadowed by a man in black, on a black horse. He then disappears.

That launches them into an adventure where they must flee their village for their safety and the village’s. But safety is the last thing they find.

In this fantasy world, time moves in a cycle, from Age to Age, repeating the same events from age to age. The cycle is dominated by the Dark One, imprisoned in his lair, and the Dragon, the hero for good. Creation is a pageant for the battle between good and evil to play out. Key personalities, like the Dragon, are reborn from Age to Age.

How the Dark One and the Dragon fit into these three boys’ lives is what this book is about.

Summary Blurb

The Wheel of Time turns and Ages come and pass, leaving memories that become legend. Legend fades to myth, and even myth is long forgotten when the Age that gave it birth returns again. What was, what will be, and what is, may yet fall under the Shadow.

Moiraine Damodred arrives in Emond’s Field on a quest to find the one prophesized to stand against The Dark One, a malicious entity sowing the seeds of chaos and destruction. When a vicious band of half-men, half beasts invade the village seeking their master’s enemy, Moiraine persuades Rand al’Thor and his friends to leave their home and enter a larger unimaginable world filled with dangers waiting in the shadows and in the light.

More of my reviews by clicking here.

Your New Reviews and Funny Memes

Chocolate Lab test
Your New Reviews

We own a black lab. We’ve never tasted him.

Your New Reviews and Some of Mine – My Undead Mother-in-law


SciFi Story Fuel My Undead Mother-in-law
Your New Reviews
My Undead Mother-in-law cover. Click to get yours.

 ·

I got a new review! Someone likes Diane Newby.

Hannah Lawson

136 reviews

February 25, 2026

My Undead Mother-in-law by Andy Zach is a horror comedy that fully embraces its ridiculous premise and runs with it.

Diane Newby is technically a zombie, but that hasn’t stopped her from hosting church bake sales or cooking Sunday dinner. What has changed is her temper. With glowing red eyes, super strength, and zero patience for disrespect, she doesn’t take kindly to being treated like anything less than normal even if “normal” now includes smashing through walls when she’s annoyed.

As society struggles to adjust to the existence of zombies, a powerful criminal mastermind sees an opportunity to control them. The only problem? Zombies like Diane don’t exactly enjoy being controlled. What follows is chaos, divided loyalties, and plenty of over the top mayhem.

If you like your horror mixed heavily with satire and absurd humor, My Undead Mother-in-law delivers action, laughs, and just enough undead madness to keep things entertaining.

More of Your New Reviews by clicking here.

Summary Blurb

My Undead Mother-in-law back cover
Your New Reviews
My Undead Mother-in-law back cover

My mother-in-law’s a zombie. And she has anger-management issues.

My mother-in-law, Diane Newby, zombified by accident. She still volunteers at her church bake sales and cooks pot roast for her daughter and son-in-law, Ron Yardley. What ticks her off is when people don’t treat her like a normal human being—with glowing red eyes and super strength and speed. And if she doesn’t get her own way, look out. She explodes and leaves broken plaster and body parts in her wake. Nothing stops her: not brick walls, the federal government, or middle-aged spread.

But the world’s most powerful criminal plans to control zombies. His only problem with zombies is that they have way too much free will. He has a solution for that. But will it work with Diane Newby?

The world divides into pro-zombie and anti-zombie factions. Battles break out everywhere. Which side will you take? Who will live and who will die?

You might not survive this book. But at least you’ll die laughing.

Click here to get an autographed copy now. You’ll get your copy autographed by me, for less cost that Amazon. I also pay for shipping and taxes.

Click here to get an ebook or paperback from Amazon.

For all free audiobooks, click here to get them from me.

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Norad Santa – Why Have I Watched It For 20 Years? – Advent 23

Norad Santa – Why Have I Watched It For 20 Years? – Advent 23 – Yes, I’ve watch Norad Santa for at least 20 years–maybe even 30. Why?

I heard about it and I couldn’t understand–why was Norad generating an animated Santa? So, I searched the internet.

Norad Santa – The Origin

The NORAD Santa Tracker began in 1955 due to a delightful mix-up. A Sears advertisement in a Colorado Springs newspaper mistakenly printed a phone number for children to call Santa. Instead of reaching Santa, the calls went to the Continental Air Defense Command (CONAD) Operations Center, where Colonel Harry Shoup answered a call from a little girl asking if he was Santa Claus. Initially taken aback, Shoup decided to play along and instructed his staff to check radar for Santa’s location, thus starting the tradition of tracking Santa on Christmas Eve 1 2.

The following year, the tradition continued, and when NORAD was established in 1958, it took over the Santa tracking responsibility. Over the decades, the program has evolved into a massive volunteer effort, utilizing military technology to “track” Santa’s journey around the world 3 4. Today, it includes a website, social media updates, and a call center staffed by volunteers, making it a beloved holiday tradition for millions 5.

Isn’t it amazing how a simple mistake turned into such a cherished global event? 🎅✨

Sources:

Timeout From Norad Santa for another Review!

Zombie Turkeys: How an Unknown Blogger Fought Unkillable Turkeys (Life After Life) cover
My Christmas List

Zombie Turkeys: How an Unknown Blogger Fought Unkillable Turkeys (Life After Life)

Katherine

44 reviews

2 followers

December 14, 2025

Zombie Turkeys is ridiculous in the best possible way.

The premise alone undead turkeys that come back stronger every time you kill them had me hooked, but the execution is what really works. Following a struggling reporter and his no-nonsense editor through a collapsing country gives the chaos structure, and the satire of modern media hits harder than expected.

The pacing is fast, the gore is gleefully over the top, and the humor never forgets it’s supposed to be fun. Grocery stores, farms, militias, livestreams each stop somehow escalates the madness without wearing out the joke.

If you like horror-comedy with B-movie energy, sharp commentary, and zero interest in playing it safe, this one delivers. I laughed, winced, and kept turning pages.

Norad Santa – Continues – What About You?

Norad Santa

Once I started watching, I was hooked. Although Norad is high tech, Santa operates by magic and billions of gifts are delivered in hours.

Have you watch Norad Santa? Do you have kids? Do you want more random posts like these? Let me know!

No Norad Santa – But More Advent Gifts for You!

Andy Zach
My Christmas List 
Norad Santa
Andy Zach in repose

One More Thing – Get All Your Autographed Books Here!

My Christmas List 
Norad Santa

Zombie Turkeys – I wrote this way back in 2015.

Zombie Detective

My Undead Mother-in-law

Paranormal Privateers

Secret Supers

Villain’s Vacation

Secret Supers in Space

The Gospel Medley
Click to order your autographed copy! Free shipping! I pay the tax!

Then, you can get The Revelation Devotional You will get the same deal, with my next non-fiction Bible book.

Otherwise, you can order from Amazon for more cost, no autograph, and you pay taxes

The Last Gift

If you want this newsletter and free books, click here.

I’ve got more gifts for you tomorrow!

Questions? Comments? Let me know by clicking here or email me at [email protected]

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