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Get Your Free Books and Laughs Right Here

Get Your Free Books and Laughs Right Here from author Andy Zach. You can win 50 free books and Andy will share his funniest memes with you.

“What?!” you say. “Where can I win 50 free books? What kind of books are they?”

“Science fiction series starters. Here you go. Click and enter the contest.”

Now Have Your Laughs. Read and Try Not to Weep from Your Laughter

Maybe you’re on a butter-free diet. Try the next one.

We all love little people who live in our homes, don’t we?

Get Your Free Books and Laughs – A new short story for you

Author Tori Smith has kindly agreed to share her hilarious short story. You can read it on Wattpad.com by clicking below.

Get Laughs Without Clicking

I quote the story below.

The Very Busy Fire Brigade

I came up with this idea from reading a humorous meme on Facebook way too many times, so I had to write something.

No one knows why people’s pants literally started catching on fire every time they told the slightest fib, but it made for very exciting television and maybe not so exciting consequences for the person involved.

Needless to say, the fire department was very busy. Major businesses had taken to employing small groups of firefighters to follow behind certain people (you know the type) and spray them down with fire extinguishers. Most people learned to live for this except for those in power, which seemed to scoff and turn up their noses at the idea despite evidence to the contrary.

None of this was more prevalent than in Washington where small groups of firefighters were kept busy around the clock every time a politician went anywhere. It didn’t matter the party or affiliation everywhere politicians’ pants were constantly bursting into flame. This also made voting easier because you always knew who was being truthful and who wasn’t.

The Very Busy Fire Brigrade, Wattpad
Get Your Free Books
Pants on fire

Part Two Follows


“Please don’t send the brigade again.” One irritated politician sighed before his latest speech.

“Are you sure sir?” A security detail asked looking worried, “it comes highly recommended.”

“I’m positive!” The politician in question snapped.  Afterward, he would straighten his lapels, and comb his close-cropped hair. “Besides, I can handle myself.”

Needless to say, said politician would be very sorry later if he had to be doused by the closest pitcher of water or if the fire department had to be called and he was out a pair of trousers.

This phenomenon was also used to great effect within the judicial system itself. Corrupt judges were weeded out and small groups of firefighters followed around criminals every time they spoke to law enforcement. Trials became efficient because there were usually quicker confessions.

Smart people tried to avoid this in the court itself, because who wanted to get charged with perjury, and well, the results spoke for themselves.

The Very Busy Fire Brigrade, Wattpad

Get Your Free Books – Even More Free Books


I give away free books with every newsletter I send. It comes out twice a month, but you can have it monthly if you want. Get your free books by clicking here. Here are some of the books you can get.

Don’t want to subscribe? Don’t want emails? You can still get free audiobooks through Audible. Click here, or the image below.

2021 Reviews Get Your Free Books
Audiobook cover – click to listen.

Last Laughs

Reply to me here if you have other funny jokes/memes you want me to post.

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The 12 Christmas Links – Will You Laugh?

The 12 Christmas Links – Will You Laugh? That’s what I want to know. Let’s start with the first link:

The NORAD Santa Tracker

I first learned about the NORAD Santa Tracker in 2000, 20 years ago. I was quite cracked up that a branch of the US military would put up this elaborate web site to track Santa’s sleigh around the world. Each year the site became more sophisticated and elaborate.

Here’s the live Youtube feed:

It’s been fun following NORAD through the years with my children, from their teenage years to adulthood. My daughter follows them on Alexa.

Up next is this blast from Christmas past.

1981 Merry Christmas

12 Christmas Links – 1981 Merry Christmas

I lived through Ronald Reagan’s Presidency, from 1981, when I was 25 to 1989, when I was 33 and married for three years.

Now, let’s have a little Christmas entertainment coming up.

My Favorite Christmas Jazz

You know it and love it too. Here you go!

Interestingly, the drummer is 78-years-old Jerry Granelli, who is the last surviving member of the “Vince Guaraldi Trio”. The Trio consisted of Guaraldi on piano, Fred Marshall on bass and Jerry Granelli on drums. They, of course, recorded the original soundtrack for “A Charlie Brown Christmas”.

For my fourth link, I go to a classic from Tchaicovsky, ‘The Dance of the Sugar Plum Fairies” as rendered in this next clip:

Link 4 – A Classic Movie and Music Clip

Have you seen Fantasia? How about Fantasia 2000? Let me know what you think of them.

Your Fifth Link – My Favorite Christmas Movie

Since I’ve breached the movie genre, let’s continue in that vein with this classic:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_N4CAO1Gcvw

I first saw ‘It’s A Wonderful Life’ as a young adult and I thought it was wonderful. What’s your favorite Christmas movie? Tell me, and I’ll give you a free audiobook.

12 Christmas Links – My Favorite Light Display Next

I play Wizards in Winter every year at Christmas.

Your Seventh Link – My Favorite Traditional Carol

But I’ve got more carols for you. Look to the following link.

Your Eighth Link – Non-traditional Christmas Carol

I love Carman! What sort of music do you like? Each response gets a free audiobook. Or you can join my newsletter here. Newsletter subscribers get all my audiobooks free.

You’ve got more coming up! Check out the eighth link below.

Next? The History of Christmas Carols

Do You Like Christmas Books?

A lot of writers create stories or books for Christmas. I haven’t done that yet, but this is the best I’ve on the subject. You’ll enjoy it for its own sake as a children’s book.

Let me know about your favorite book, Christmas or not. I’ll gladly give you an audiobook.

Now for a Christmas Laugh

This is the original and official video to go with this famous Christmas comedy song.

For my last link, let’s talk about the reason for the season.

12 Christmas Links – The Reason for the Season

12 Christmas Links
Why We Celebrate Christmas

Opinion: There’s never been a better Christmas . . .

And with that, let me wish you and your loved ones and very merry Christmas!

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Andy Zach Cruises the Internet and Gives Stuff Away

Christmas Zombie Turkey Style

Andy Zach Cruises the Internet and Gives Stuff Away

This is one of those posts where you will laugh and get free stuff. How? Andy Zach Cruises the Internet–that’s how I find funny stuff.

But what about the free stuff? I’m in touch with a lot of authors and I find free stuff on the internet. Let’s start with the funny things.

Andy Zach Cruises the Internet–the First Funny

How about Thor: Rangarok set to ABBA’s ‘Dancing Queen’?

If this isn’t funny enough for you, post something funnier in this blog’s comments or send it to me. I’ll give a free ebook to the funniest link I get.

Andy Zach Cruises the Internet–the First Freebie

How about a free newsletter from me? How about a free book? I’ve got these:

Andy Zach cruises the Internet
Andy Zach’s three novels in his Life After Life Chronicles, the comic paranormal animal zombie saga.

I hold one drawing every month for my newsletter subscribers. Join now!

Your Next Funny

Did you like Thor: Rogarnok set to ABBA? How about Captain America Winter Soldier?

Your Next Freebie

Okay, maybe you don’t like books. How about audiobooks?

Listen to a free sample of Zombie Turkeys by clicking here:

Andy Zach cruises
Zombie Turkeys audiobook cover. Click to get!

Or listen to My Undead Mother-in-law here:

 

Andy Zach Cruises

My Undead Mother-in-law audiobook cover. Click to get yours!

If the vocal actors Phil Blechman and Raven Perez portraying my wacky characters appeal to you, then get on the newsletter mailing list. I have a monthly drawing for a free audiobook, including the end of this month.

The Last Funny Bit

The Last Freebie

One of my author friends, Rik Ty is giving away free stories. Grab yours while you can!

Click here to get them!

And now, here’s some free nostalgia:

One More Thing

I love Weird Al Yankovic! Who else can out bizarre Lady Gaga?